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The Most Heartfelt (and Heartbreaking) Christmas Gift


It was the biggest heartbreak and the most tenderly beloved gift all in one...


Have you known a pet to change your life so ever-irrefutably forevermore?


This was my Louie Dewey Mocha Latte. My fur-child, my beloved, my everything.


First and foremost, I wish everyone the brightest and happiest of holidays. I'm delighted to celebrate this year with joy, love, and gratitude. Meaningfully.


Celebrating happiness on this day is not always the case, as most of us know. And if this is a challenging year for you, I wrap you in gentle comfort and care. Especially if you've lost a loved one and/or are lighting a candle in the memory of a once-embodied soul, you may be missing at this time.


At Christmas time, I will forevermore honor an aspect of this date in memory of a sacred synchronicity. As we all know, the loss of a loved one can sometimes seem only moments ago.


It was years ago, Divinity offered me a most treasured sign— also in the form of the most heartbreaking gift:


An excerpt from my book, Amping Your Abilities:

"One synchronistic event was the timing leading to Louie's death. I knew my fur child was in decline from kidney disease. Months before his death, I did a lot of talking to Spirit. I did a lot of bargaining too. I asked God to either take Louie on my upcoming birthday in November or take him on Christmas. If that happened, I pleaded with Divine— I'd be assured that there was Love on the other side to greet him. It turns out that the ultimate gift in my life (Louie) was given back to Divine at a significant time. I had not known that my partner at the time had also been bargaining. We discovered later that he had been pleading not to let Louie die on Christmas. So it happened an hour after Christmas. I knew with my entire being that Divine received my baby boy and dearest treasure."


It was clear to me that Divinity/God/Spirit had listened— a gift of knowing the Love that is there when we commune with "The Universe." That my months of heartbreaking daily bargaining had been honored. So tenderly.


I can easily cry when I drop into the thinnest of lines between loss and gain. And sometimes I do— years later, as I now dab my face with a tissue.


But the gain. OMG, the gain... so tremendous. First, in simply the honor of knowing my sweet Louie Dew Baby Boy Ticky Tat Kitten Cat Lion Dove joy of my life. We had such fun, incredible connection time, and the most natural knowingness of one another in this fantastic shared lifetime. Thank you, Louie. Thank you, God.


And furthermore, a connection that continues to this day— in signs and synchronicities. Feathers, hearts, cat whiskers, and more. Gratitude to those who have brought witness to the intimacy of our story. Louie's spirit has been a conduit of connecting me more intimately with Divinity at work.


So while my heart breaks on this day. It is with a smile for the knowing. And for the trusting— WE ARE HELD. Sometimes silently, without knowing we're being supported. And sometimes clearly and synchronistically— in the raw beauty this life has to offer.

As I write this, the clock has just turned to Christmas. I wish you all sacred love in the spirit of this sovereign day. Moments from now, I will be laying my head down to sleep with Sunshine (my current kitty's name) so applicatively within my reach.










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